Holiday Joy and Tears
The memories of the people and pets who are missing are bitter-sweet and best shared, but I tend to keep my sadness close and only bring it out in the quiet dark times. Although, there are moments I’m hit hard from out of no where, by a memory. For years, after my dad passed away, I could be anywhere: driving down the highway, having lunch with friends, in church, listening to music – anywhere – and WHAM!, there would be the pain of losing dad all over again.
But it is always worse during the holiday season. At least I know that now he’s not alone. Mom and my youngest brother are with him, along with all but two of the aunts and uncles.
And there was Fluffy, before him, who is buried under the bleeding heart in the back corner of my yard.
New additions to the family have saved the holiday season and are a delightful blessing. I can see my late husband in our granddaughters. The oldest one has the family look that has been passed down from generation to generation. And I can’t help but smile as they laugh and go through their antics. They do a lot to fill up the empty spaces.
And thank God for old and new friends, they laugh when I need to laugh, cry when I need to cry and carry me when I can’t carry myself.
In the evening I look at my Christmas tree, bright with colored lights and filled with precious memories. I raise a glass of wine in a toast to all of the amazing people who have shared my life, to all of the people I am still to meet and to the adventures we will have. I am looking forward with joy and anticipation.
I wish you all a happy holiday season and a prosperous New Year.